Three Things That Made Me Laugh Today
1. Seeing My Dad Have His First Conversation on a Cordless Phone
The phone rang while I was in my bedroom, so I picked it up on my recently-transplanted-from-Kingston cordless phone. It was a call from one of Dad's colleagues, so I naturally wandered out of my room to call Dad up from the basement, phone in hand. I gave him the handset, and it was about three-quarters of the way to his ear when he noticed that (horror of horrors) this phone had no cord. He gave me a very eloquent look that was halfway between "What the hell is this?" and "I would rather trust a fast man on a well-shod horse than this contraption." But I gave him the thumbs up, and so opening greeting into the handset was not only loud enough to reach his collegue without aid of the phone, it was also tentative enough that he could laugh it off if it turned out that (as he suspected) I had actually given him some sort of pretend phone.
After his conversation was done, I pointed out the hilarity of his expression. While he tried to say he was just playing his confusion up for laughs, I know better -- the Luddite doth protest too much.
2. Lamb, by Christopher Moore
"Know what?" Jesus said. " I love bunnies. They toil not, neither do they bark. Henceforth and from now on, I decree that whenever something bad happens to me, there shall be bunnies around. So it shall be written. Go ahead Biff, write it down."
That's from "The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal". Not only is the book hilarious, it's also actually pretty accurate. I mean, not about the bunnies, but it does try and figure out what Jesus did between 12 and 30 years old (short answer: Kung Fu and Meditation) and it does a fabulous job of recasting those famous Gospel sound-bites into very human interactions. It's good with the historical details and doesn't bother itself with reverence, but it doesn't take pot-shots at Christianity either. Plus, it's one more book getting out the word that Mary of Magdelen is not (repeat NOT) a prostitute. Hurrah!
3. The New Brazilian Football Star
If you know anything about Football or the World Cup, you've probably heard the names of some of the famous strikers on the Brazilian team. Ronaldo. Ronaldinho. For some reason (probably because their last names are frickin' long), Brazilian footballers tend to take on a snappy single moniker for themselves when they get to the big leagues. Sometimes this works quite well -- Ronaldo De Assis Moreira becomes... Ronaldinho! Sometimes it works not so well, as in the case of Ricardo dos Santos Leite, who thought it would be a good idea to become Kaka. Oh dear.
However, nothing can beat Frederico Chaves Guedes, who scored a goal in Brazil's last game after coming on as a substitution. The man who will forever more be known only as the name on the back of his jersey, which proudly proclaims Fred.
3 Comments:
Loved Lamb, I'm so glad someone else is reading it. Some of my favorite bits, though, I admit, were Biff adjusting to modern day and the Angel. That was good. Of course, a stranger in a strange world always makes for good comedy.
7:26 PM
Indeed. I, being a religion junkie, liked his "behind-the-scenes" look at Jesus' ministry in the last quarter of the book (although it got sad at the end, as Jesus' story tends to). Although for sheer comedy, I don't think you could beat the bit in India with the Kama Sutra and the Son of God getting stuck in a bottle.
8:30 AM
Bwah ha! "H-hello...? How dare you give me this pretend phone!"
I think the bit that made me laugh the most in Lamb where Joshua climbs into Biff's bag ("It took me most of the afternoon."). Or maybe the part with Jesus the bellboy ("Now spit on him and swear." "You fuckstick!" "Not in English!"). Or maybe the bit in the very beginning with the zombie lizard. Or maybe the bit with Joshua's favourite analogy failing him. Or the angel wanting to be Spiderman. Or Jew-do. I bet you can understand why I was nagging you for so long to read it.
Hej from Sweden! Attended Swedish Midsummer celebration today (included raising of the Midsummer pole, by men only...can that be any more subtle?).
It can't get much better than Fred. No wait, the Swedes tying their game with English by scoring in the 85th minute was pretty damn cool.
2:51 PM
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